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Michael Davis
Junior Member
Username: Michael_davis

Post Number: 71
Registered: 06-2005
Posted on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 01:58 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I gather that there is a huge interest in the Bible here...as in other places. However, many people are afraid to say they are interested. But do not be afraid. Also, there are many who have not studied and know little, but they would wish to post thosands of posts. However, I will ask them kindly not to post on this thread at all unless they have serious questions only, and do not intend to try to turn it into a debate.

I have started this thread for those who really have questions, and who really wish to know. Those who are seekers and wish to learn. If you have questions about the Bible, ask them, and they will be carefully answered with patience. If I am not around for a while, send me an e-mail.

It is my intent to answer all questions, however, it is not my intent to hear out things like whether or not people think that "God is fair." That is going to have to be saved up for a counseling class or something.

One last note. This is a beginners class. As such, we are only to discuss the newest part of the Bible: *The New Testament*. This was written about 2000 years ago and is mostly about Jesus, his role, what is expected of humanity, and what is to happen after death.
 

Bill Pierce
Moderator
Username: Billpierce

Post Number: 3519
Registered: 01-2002
Posted on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 02:20 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Michael, I respect your faith and perhaps your knowledge of the Bible. However, I would suggest that even the "World Expressions" section of the Brews & Views board is not really intended for proselytizing and that there are probably better places on the Net for that.

But that's only my opinion. If others want to have a Bible discussion class, I'll defer to them.
 

Pope BigEarl
Unregistered guest
Posted on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 03:23 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

hahaha, who are you, that has answers to the "questions" of the Bible

It's me that has the correct answers, so ask me , not him

ye false prophets will be smote
 

Paul Hayslett
Advanced Member
Username: Paulhayslett

Post Number: 853
Registered: 02-2002
Posted on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 03:31 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

[Bill, it is actually quite easy to determine if Michael intends to proselytize or actually discuss. All we need do is ask the following questions:]

Michael, you would like to restrict the content of this thread to "The New Testament". I have some questions about the boundaries of that.

- May we ask about non-canonical sources, such as the Gnostic Gospels, the Dead Sea scrolls, and Coptic traditions? If not, why not?

- There has been much dispute over the provenance of a number of the Letters, and several are now openly acknowledged to be forgeries. May we discuss this?

- May we discuss the political and social situation of the early Christian church and how that may have determined the current composition of the Canon? In particular, may we discuss the writings of Paula Fredrickson, Robin Lane Fox, Jaroslav Pelikan, John J. O'Donnell, Elaine Pagels, et al.?

- May we discuss how the current Canon may or may not reflect St. Augustine's personal views and his political needs?

- May we discuss the effects of translation, bowdlerization, and reinterpretation? Which translation shall we use?

As you can see, I have studied the New Testament a bit myself, although probably not in the same way that you have. Before I engage in this discussion, I am interested in seeing the extent to which it will accept that humans, in all their messy, self-interested ways, have shaped this body of work.
 

Michael Davis
Junior Member
Username: Michael_davis

Post Number: 72
Registered: 06-2005
Posted on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 04:41 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

As you probably guessed, it is not my intent, in this thread at least, to "discuss" or debate anything. But you can certainly take that to the other two church related threads. It is simply my intent to answer any questions that true seekers have. Some people, rightly so, have concerns about their life (and upcoming death) and want to better understand what God expects of them in exchange for eternal life and what role Jesus plays. It is only that important matter that I wish to focus on this thread. If enough people show concern, I can open another thread later to go into the details of the pitfalls of modern "scholarship". If you want immediate help personally with your concerns, you are welcome to e-mail me.


However, for the benefit of the group, I may as well make one blanket statement about modern "scholarship". However, as it is not a discussion or debate, it is the only one that I will make on this thread. The Bible says:

"But understand this, that in the last days difficult times will come. For people will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, unloving, irreconcilable, slanderers, without self-control, savage, opposed to what is good, treacherous, reckless, conceited, loving pleasure rather than loving God. They will maintain the outward appearance of religion but will have repudiated its power. So avoid people like these."

Let us focus on the next to last sentence. "They will maintain the outward appearance of religion but will have repudiated its power." Most modern churches have a definite outward appearance of religion. Fancy outfits, "church-like" buildings, etc. Some even attempt to talk in old english. But the most dangerous aspect is the illusion of education. Some preachers even put "Ph.D" or "Dr." with their name. Most preachers go to seminary, etc. But despite all of the so-called learning, most who graduate have never even read all of the Bible. Just one book. They read so many other books and learn so many opinions and theories, but never even bother to actually read the whole Bible. Many Ph.D programs are more interested in theory based on what people think happened thousands of years ago rather than focusing on the only complete source of carbon-dated records that are available from the time. And also, you will see that most of the churches in the news are busy modifying their doctrine so it is contemporary with the times. Although that is expressly forbidden in the scriptures, they will do it, and hold up a Bible in church while they talk as if they are using its authority. That is outward appearance. Now, notice what it says about the "power". The power of God can make life and end life. It can bring back the dead. It can do anything in your imagination and anything beyond. So for people to claim that God could not ensure that the Bible turned out perfectly for millenia is the same as claiming that God could not have raised Jesus from the dead...it is a simple repudiation of His power. I am sure He is not impressed.

But let's look at another verse.

"But avoid profane chatter, because those occupied with it will stray further and further into ungodliness, and their message will spread its infection like gangrene."

What better word than "chatter" would describe endless discussion, debate, and theories about the Bible rather than the actual reading of it? And yet that is what modern scholarship is founded on.

Here are two more quotes that say it all. Keep in mind that this is from 2000 years ago. Consider the language usage that preserves its meaning and power over such a great deal of time.

"Now the Spirit explicitly says that in the later times some will desert the faith and occupy themselves with deceiving spirits and demonic teachings, influenced by the hypocrisy of liars whose consciences are seared."

"For there will be a time when people will not tolerate sound teaching. Instead, following their own desires, they will accumulate teachers for themselves, because they have an insatiable curiosity to hear new things."

Doesn't that last one describe that insatiable desire for people to believe in something like the Da Vinci Code, which is clearly a work of fiction? And yet so similar to much of modern scholarship. A best seller.

There is not a more complete source of data about the time of the Bible and the Bible itself than what is in the Bible. And yet modern scholarship spends its time with external fragments, scraps, and theories...and yet it will not even insist on a complete and thorough studying of the text! What senseless deceit!
 

Paul Hayslett
Advanced Member
Username: Paulhayslett

Post Number: 854
Registered: 02-2002
Posted on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 05:23 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I see. Inferring from your post: I am not a true seeker, I am an idle chatterer, and I engage in senseless deceit. Hmmmm.....

It happens that I HAVE read the New Testament straight through. Twice. Every word of 2 different English translations. Plus I have dipped liberally into a couple of others. It wasn't easy. For a short book, it can be surprisingly difficult to read, especially the Letters and Revelation.

What I found there, at least in the Gospels, was a message of deep meaning, glorious hope, radical acceptance of human frailty, and faith in the power of God. I found the story of a man who knew He carried an important message, but was too humble and too loving to throw vitriol at those who didn't understand it.

I did NOT find, in the Gospels, a call to repudiate scholarship. In fact, there are clear indications that Jesus saw himself as part of the tradition of devout Jewish scholars who had been discussing, debating, and reinterpreting their Bible for thousands of years. When He quoted from scripture, he freely reinterpreted it in light of the new situation (i.e., His existence).

Many devout Christians wear bracelets saying "What Would Jesus Do?" I urge you to ask yourself if Jesus would react to my post as you did.

I would also urge you to ask yourself if it is not possible to continue seeking the truth even after you have found (part of) it.
 

Joseph Listan
Advanced Member
Username: Poonstab

Post Number: 801
Registered: 03-2003
Posted on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 05:55 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

God help us all...

You are implying that biblical scholars haven't read the Bible? Are you mad? Have you been to college? Do you have even the slightest concept of the scientific method?

No respected or self-respecting scholar, historian, or scientist studies literature about a subject without studying the subject itself. How could you? That's like writing a book about the literature of Mark Twain without ever reading any Twain. People can be idiots, but no true scholar actually does *that*. Their peer reviews would make them wish to be victims of an old testament stoning.

For example, if you were a scientifically-minded biblical scholar and you wanted to study King David, where would you even start? You are trying to "prove" or disprove something, don't you need to identify what that something is?

You say the bible is historically accurate, but you refuse to heed the thousands of scholars in disciplines that PROVE its accuracy or inaccuracy.

This is a logical fallacy, and an irritating one at that. More specifically, it is a theory without sufficient supporting data (this sounds like Creationism or Intelligent Design to me). "One" source is not statistically sufficient source data, and you certainly cannot use the subject itself as its own supporting data in the absence of anything else.

[sigh]

I only have one query for you Mr. Davis:
Are you aware of whom it was that decided what would be in the Bible (forgetting about translations and revisions for a moment), and when this was done? Can you give us any indication of why the Canon was hand-picked to be the way it is now (generally), and why the other works that Paul H mentions, many of which are CONTEMPORARY works by people who claim to have known Jesus personally (even intimately), were excluded? And by the way, none of the books in the Canon were written by a contemporary of Jesus, and even the oldest books are only about 1900 years old. You do the math. Anything written by someone who actually might have known The Guy was excluded.

The Dead Sea scrolls are proven to be real. There are relevant works by other Coptics and Gnostics that are genuine and contemporary. Why were they left out? Tell us Michael, please... why were these omitted?

It is you who are deceived, my friend, and by your own closed mind and fearful unwillingness to accept the real truth. This is a shame because many biblical scholars are able to maintain their faith even after they know the TRUTH, but you are too afraid to even expose yourself to knowledge that will potentially create more questions than your simple, silly, baseless faith provides answers for.

The Da Vinci code does not claim to be anything other than fiction. The bashing of this novel as some sort of "anti-proof" by silly evnangelicals is getting tiresome. The concepts the book is based on have a lot of support, however, and it is of the scholarly variety that includes...gosh...REAL data.

Or, if you want to actually use the bible to disprove modern dogma, here's an example: Jewish law dictates that you MUST be married to be a Rabbi. The Bible states, in numerous passages, that Jesus was a Rabbi. Therefore, Jesus was married. That's called "logic", and it is supported by the plethora of references to him being a Rabbi, right there in your very own precious myth book. Who was he married to? The same one Simon Peter was so jealous of. You know your story book better than I do, so you must know it was The Magdalene. Argue all you want, but you gotta be married to be a rabbi. Call any synagogue and they'll tell ya. Seems that St. Augustine and his cronies, in their complete ignorance of Jewish law, forgot to cover up that little detail when the Council of Nicea composed the Canon. Oops...

Face it, the Bible was composed
 

Michael Davis
Junior Member
Username: Michael_davis

Post Number: 73
Registered: 06-2005
Posted on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 06:50 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Thank you for your post, Joseph. A rant from one who hates God is just about as educational as anything I could have come up with.

Students, pay close attention. The zeal of their hate should show you that there is something important afoot here. All of this effort and anger over a "myth". Does anyone get angry over Zeus? Of course not, that would be silly. But do not be dismayed...simply consider what was said to Samuel.
 

Heath
Intermediate Member
Username: Frizedo

Post Number: 462
Registered: 09-2004
Posted on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 08:29 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

http://www.jesusdressup.com/index.html
 

Wykowski
Senior Member
Username: Bigearl

Post Number: 1309
Registered: 12-2002
Posted on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 09:00 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

COOL, I dressed Jesus up like a Ballet dancing - scuba diver

(Message edited by bigearl on September 20, 2005)
"...he brewed white lightnin' till the sun went down, then he filled him a jug and he passed it around..."
 

Wykowski
Senior Member
Username: Bigearl

Post Number: 1310
Registered: 12-2002
Posted on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 09:17 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

It seems that many Christian Zealots, act more like the those who nailed Christ to the Cross, than Christ himself

If there is a hell, the preachers will be among the first to go !!!! (stealing money from the weak minded in the name of God, is pretty evil)
"...he brewed white lightnin' till the sun went down, then he filled him a jug and he passed it around..."
 

Paul Hayslett
Advanced Member
Username: Paulhayslett

Post Number: 855
Registered: 02-2002
Posted on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 09:34 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I'm still waiting to find out which translation we will be discussing. I think I have 3 or 4 here in the house, and I know where to find a few others online. As soon as I know what our base text is, I'm ready to participate!

Oh, wait. Michael doesn't want me to *participate*. Just to shut up and listen....
"Sargeant Colon had had a broad education. He'd been to the School of My Dad Always Said, the College of It Stands To Reason, and was now a postgraduate student at the University of What Some Bloke In The Pub Told Me." -- Terry Pratchett
 

Jake Isaacs
Intermediate Member
Username: Jake

Post Number: 356
Registered: 04-2002
Posted on Tuesday, September 20, 2005 - 09:49 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

"But understand this, that in the last days difficult times will come. For people will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, arrogant, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, ungrateful, unholy, unloving, irreconcilable, slanderers, without self-control, savage, opposed to what is good, treacherous, reckless, conceited, loving pleasure rather than loving God. They will maintain the outward appearance of religion but will have repudiated its power. So avoid people like these."

This is a pretty laughable "prophecy". You could characterize any time, any place in the history of man with that statement. That is one reason why at least some of the apostles were convinced that the end would occur in their lifetimes. Ditto with many medieval theologians.

In fact, that second-to-last sentence that you seem to put so much emphasis on is very reminicient of the opinion Jesus is depicted as having of the ruling Pharisees of his day.

Like most zealots, your "I've got the absolute truth right here. so ask nicely and I'll show it to you" position does more to drive people away from Christianity than bring them in. You'd do more good by toning it down or (heaven forbid) shutting yer preach-hole.
 

John Jacox
Member
Username: Johnj

Post Number: 152
Registered: 03-2003
Posted on Wednesday, September 21, 2005 - 12:41 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Reminds me of the time long ago when I was attending a school. One of my room mates was never without his Bible and was constantly quoting it. He took endless delight in telling me I was going to hell for drinking beer. When I pointed out to him that Jesus turned the water into wine at the wedding party, he told me that was a mistaken translation and that He actually turned the water into grapejuice! To confuse matters even more, he used to go to the topless bars and preach to the girls between sets. He even used to go to the parking lot with them and smoke dope. When I tried to point out to him that if drinking beer was a sin, smoking dope must be also, but his reply was that the Bible didn't say "Thou shalt not smoke dope". (Of course, I guess I missed the "thou shalt not drink beer line.) Eventually, he ended up marrying one of the dancers who was just as devout and confused as he was, and I can only imagine how messed up any children from that union must have turned out! Needless to say, myself and our other room mate took great pleasure in seeing how many times a day we could get him to tell us we were going to hell (the cojones of anyone thinking they have the right to decide who goes to hell stupifies me!). My general experience has been that (with rare exceptions) the more obsessed a person is with religion, the less their behavior seems to reflect the Being they revere. Just my personal experience, YMMV. I have had jobs in the past that had me in churches installing and repairing equipment. I have been in "counting rooms" that had 15 stations and a glass window for the main accountant to supervise (had cameras installed too!). I once saw a homeless man enter a church and ask the preacher (who had just driven up in his new BMW) for something to eat. The preacher reached into a food donation barrel, dug out a jar of peanut butter and handed it to the man telling him this was the perfect food, he then turned his back and walked away. I guess if I had had any balls I would have reached into my pocket, handed the guy a dollar and loudly proclaimed that now he could get a loaf of bread too, but it probably would have gotten me fired. I just kept imagining the bum and his buddies sitting around the campfire and eating peanut butter with their fingers! Oh well, rant over!
 

Paul Hayslett
Advanced Member
Username: Paulhayslett

Post Number: 856
Registered: 02-2002
Posted on Wednesday, September 21, 2005 - 03:16 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Since we are throwing Bible verses around, here's one of my favorites.

"My friends, if anyone is detected in a transgression, you who have received the Spirit should restore such a one in a spirit of gentleness. Take care that you yourselves are not tempted." Galatians 6:1

I think that "spirit of gentleness" has been missing in many of today's posts, mine as much as anyone else's. I'm sorry if I have offended anyone.
"Sargeant Colon had had a broad education. He'd been to the School of My Dad Always Said, the College of It Stands To Reason, and was now a postgraduate student at the University of What Some Bloke In The Pub Told Me." -- Terry Pratchett
 

Dan Listermann
Senior Member
Username: Listermann

Post Number: 1692
Registered: 03-2004
Posted on Wednesday, September 21, 2005 - 03:40 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

XLII

--This space is again being left intentionally blank.-


 

Catt22
Member
Username: Catt22

Post Number: 162
Registered: 12-2000
Posted on Wednesday, September 21, 2005 - 03:46 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

"One last note. This is a beginners class. As such, we are only to discuss the newest part of the Bible: *The New Testament*.

Would not the best place for beginners to begin be at the beginning? Why avoid the O.T.?

IMO, the bible is a very, very weird book.

...blessed be thine automasher, the ultimate salvation for homebrewers at last!
 

Catt22
Member
Username: Catt22

Post Number: 163
Registered: 12-2000
Posted on Wednesday, September 21, 2005 - 04:07 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

What did Jesus H. Christ look like?

http://www.fadetoblack.com/jesus2000/
 

A.G. Nostic
Unregistered guest
Posted on Wednesday, September 21, 2005 - 07:23 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

"As you probably guessed, it is not my intent, in this thread at least, to "discuss" or debate anything."

That pretty much says it all. MD offers "education" with no discussion or debate. Sounds like indoctrination to me. But, as my alter-ego would say, "butwhatthefuckdoIknow?".

"I think that "spirit of gentleness" has been missing in many of today's posts, mine as much as anyone else's. I'm sorry if I have offended anyone."

Fear not, Paul. You have nothing to apologize for. You asked a number of simple yet insightful questions. What happens? Surprise, surprise, instead of even a thinly veiled attempt at answering them, MD ducks behind his usual shield of self-righteous arrogance and indignation directed toward anyone who dares question his vast expertise of the bible. You have behaved nothing less than admirably throughout this thread.

Just a hint, Mike. Effective teachers generally greet simple, direct questions with simple, direct answers.
 

Michael Davis
Junior Member
Username: Michael_davis

Post Number: 74
Registered: 06-2005
Posted on Wednesday, September 21, 2005 - 12:05 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Effective teachers generally throw the rabble out of the class, so as to enable the quality students to learn. As that is not possible for me to do here, and as there is such a high percentage of rabble here, I am out. Anyone who really wants to learn about the Bible can send me an e-mail.
 

Fredrik
Senior Member
Username: Fredrik

Post Number: 2594
Registered: 03-2003
Posted on Wednesday, September 21, 2005 - 12:25 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

> Effective teachers generally greet simple, direct questions with simple, direct answers.

Preaching and teaching are two different things. To me a great teacher doesn't ask you to believe a single ting "because he says so". He wants the students to understand.

I took a class for an interesting professor once that when someone asked him to verify if the solutions to excercises was right or wrong, he got a bit annoyed and replied that

"Since you need to ask me if this is correct, you clearly have not understood what you have done. When you master this, you will no longer come to be for verification. You will know when it's right."

/Fredrik
 

Miker
Intermediate Member
Username: Miker

Post Number: 283
Registered: 02-2003
Posted on Wednesday, September 21, 2005 - 02:51 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

"and as there is such a high percentage of rabble here, I am out"

And I thought the best way to get rid of trolls was to ignore them. You guys proved me wrong.
 

Dead Sea Surfer
Unregistered guest
Posted on Wednesday, September 21, 2005 - 04:24 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

My favorite story in the Bible was were Lot hooked up an egg timer to his stove and burned down the whole town.
 

Guest User
Unregistered guest
Posted on Wednesday, September 21, 2005 - 06:12 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Holy !

New Topic, same old story. My way, or the Highway.

Sad, Sad, Sad.

May God have mercy on your warped, automash making soul.
 

Confused
Unregistered guest
Posted on Wednesday, September 21, 2005 - 08:51 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

"My favorite story in the Bible was were Lot hooked up an egg timer to his stove and burned down the whole town."

I'm laughing so hard it hurts!!!!!
 

Jake Isaacs
Intermediate Member
Username: Jake

Post Number: 357
Registered: 04-2002
Posted on Wednesday, September 21, 2005 - 09:26 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

"Effective teachers generally throw the rabble out of the class, so as to enable the quality students to learn."

Thank you, you've revealed yourself beautifully. Jesus mainly associated with and preached to "rabble". It's clear now (as if it wasn't before) how much you truly want to emulate him.

What you really mean by "quality students" is people that already agree with you or are dimwitted enough to be spoon-fed your dogma. Hence your aforementioned aversion to discussion.

There are quite a few hard-core Christians that have participated in discussions on this board, but curiously few have risen to your defense. I'd recommend that you think hard on why that might be.
 

Chumley
Senior Member
Username: Chumley

Post Number: 3655
Registered: 02-2003
Posted on Wednesday, September 21, 2005 - 10:22 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Indeed, Dead Sea Surfer's post is the funniest thing I have read on this board in a very long time.
 

Kenny Reed
Member
Username: Ken

Post Number: 152
Registered: 12-2002
Posted on Thursday, September 22, 2005 - 01:45 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I'm not even gonna bother scrolling up to read this entire post.. but I think beer is cool!
 

Catt22
Member
Username: Catt22

Post Number: 164
Registered: 12-2000
Posted on Thursday, September 22, 2005 - 03:01 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

"Effective teachers generally throw the rabble out of the class, so as to enable the quality students to learn. As that is not possible for me to do here, and as there is such a high percentage of rabble here, I am out."

Thank god!
 

Denny Conn
Senior Member
Username: Denny

Post Number: 5088
Registered: 01-2001
Posted on Thursday, September 22, 2005 - 04:23 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Wow, we're all rabble! I feel kinda warm and fuzzy....
LIfe begins at 60...1.060, that is.
 

Skotrat
Senior Member
Username: Skotrat

Post Number: 1323
Registered: 04-2003
Posted on Thursday, September 22, 2005 - 12:10 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

"STANTZ
(forceful)
As a duly-constituted representative of the
City of New York, and on behalf of the
County and State of New York, the United
States of America, the Planet Earth and all
its inhabitants, I hereby order you to cease
and desist any and all supernatural activity
and return at once to your place of origin
or next parallel dimension.

VENKMAN
(to Stantz)
Well, that ought to do it.

GOZER

He stands up to his full height and regards Stantz curiously.

GOZER
Are you a god?

STANTZ
(compulsively honest)
No.

GOZER
Then die!

He raises his arms and blows away the Ghostbusters with searing bolts of
energy.

THE GHOSTBUSTERS

Momentarily stunned, they tumble all the way down the stairs and almost
fall off the edge of the roof.

WINSTON
(to Stantz)
You should've said "yes!" He might have been willing to negotiate."
 

Dan Listermann
Senior Member
Username: Listermann

Post Number: 1702
Registered: 03-2004
Posted on Thursday, September 22, 2005 - 12:15 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Copy and paste fun!

Dan

--This space is again being left intentionally blank.-


 

Skotrat
Senior Member
Username: Skotrat

Post Number: 1324
Registered: 04-2003
Posted on Thursday, September 22, 2005 - 12:19 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Yet it makes perfect sense on this thread though huh danny boy?
 

Skotrat
Senior Member
Username: Skotrat

Post Number: 1325
Registered: 04-2003
Posted on Thursday, September 22, 2005 - 12:22 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Besides on such an enlightening thread as this I expect that everyone expected that I or someone would be expected to post Monty Pythons "THE SPANISH INQUISITION SKETCH"

But maybe nobody expected that.
 

Dan Listermann
Senior Member
Username: Listermann

Post Number: 1703
Registered: 03-2004
Posted on Thursday, September 22, 2005 - 12:45 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I suppose so Scotty Lad!

Dan

--This space is again being left intentionally blank.-


 

davidw
Senior Member
Username: Davidw

Post Number: 1302
Registered: 03-2001
Posted on Thursday, September 22, 2005 - 04:04 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I'd be up for a discussion of The Book of Armorments . . .
 

KS
Unregistered guest
Posted on Thursday, September 22, 2005 - 09:04 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Wow. except for the first and fifth and eighth posts, this thread was very concise and informational. I didn't even know Lot had an early easymasher prototype
 

Beerboy AKA The Jolly Brewer
Advanced Member
Username: Matfink

Post Number: 760
Registered: 03-2003
Posted on Friday, September 23, 2005 - 04:14 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I've just read that post with absolute horror, then almost wet myself laughing. Micheal Davis is one poor deluded fool, his posts reinforce everything I hate about religion, the posts afterwards reinforced my love of humans.

Hail Satan!
 

Joseph Listan
Advanced Member
Username: Poonstab

Post Number: 803
Registered: 03-2003
Posted on Friday, September 23, 2005 - 05:01 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

>>>Thank you for your post, Joseph. A rant from one who hates God is just about as educational as anything I could have come up with.

Wow Michael, there's leaping to a conlcusion. Where in my "rant" is there any mention of "hating God"?
What I hate are judgemental, self-righteous know-it-all people who leap to wild conclusions, without any data to support their argument.

Where the hell do you get off telling me that I hate God, you little proselytizing troll?

I happen to be on pretty good terms with Him, in my own Quaker/Hindu/Druid way. You can resume judging me now that you know my "professed" religion and it doesn't exactly match your puny cosmic view; and I'm sure you won't be able to help yourself, in spite of what your Man-God purportedly said about judging others. You don't know one damned thing more about God than I do, and you don't know me at all.

Wanna know how I judge you, in *my* cosmos? I think your soul is very young, inexperienced and naive. I think that in a past life you may have had it too easy or perhaps you've previously been in charge of others' spiritual development and didn't do a very good job of it. Your soul has carried over some arrogance to its current bio-container, and you are failing to make very much progress this time around as well, which leads you to hate PEOPLE in your professed love for GOD, and you blame your failures to understand the true meaning of GOD on others. Overall, you're way behind me in the grand line for Nirvana. I only hope that maybe I have taught YOU something here and you can mend your errant ways before you have to do this yet again.

But in the meantime, you have a lot of nerve telling me I hate God. In fact, I consider this LIBEL. You'll be hearing from my lawyer soon...
 

Catt22
Member
Username: Catt22

Post Number: 169
Registered: 12-2000
Posted on Friday, September 23, 2005 - 11:57 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Joseph,

Are you an automasher user?
 

M Deity
Unregistered guest
Posted on Tuesday, September 27, 2005 - 06:08 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

My favorite story in the Bible was were Lot hooked up an egg timer to his stove and burned down the whole town.

Yes, that one happened in wha is now Ohio. God warned Lot not to go to Ohio with his egg timer, but Lot went anyway, even though egg timer's were verboten in Ohio.

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