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Connie
Senior Member
Username: Connie

Post Number: 1357
Registered: 10-2000
Posted on Monday, March 16, 2009 - 09:18 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

A United States Marine was attending some college courses between Assignments. He had completed missions in Iraq and Afghanistan. One of The courses had a professor who was an
avowed atheist and a member of The ACLU.
One day the professor shocked the class when he came in he looked to the Ceiling and flatly stated, God, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform.
I'll give you exactly 15 minutes. The Lecture room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop..
Ten minutes went by and the professor proclaimed, Here I am God. I'm Still waiting. It got down to the last couple of minutes when the Marine got out of his chair, went up to the professor, and cold-cocked Him, knocking him
off the platform. The professor was laying on the floor out cold.
The Marine went back to his seat and sat there, silently. The other Students were shocked, stunned, and sat there looking on in silence. The Professor eventually came to, noticeably shaken, looked at the Marine and asked, What
the heck is the matter with you? Why did you do that? The Marine calmly replied, God was too busy today protecting American Soldiers who are protecting your right to say stupid stuff and act like An idiot. So, He sent me.
 

Kevin Kowalczyk
Intermediate Member
Username: Itsfunbrewingbeer

Post Number: 495
Registered: 10-2007
Posted on Tuesday, March 17, 2009 - 01:54 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Did the marine get arrested for battery and kicked out of college and/or the military?
 

Paul Hayslett
Senior Member
Username: Paulhayslett

Post Number: 2096
Registered: 02-2002
Posted on Tuesday, March 17, 2009 - 11:42 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Don't take it seriously, Kevin. It's sheer fantasy.

I know a lot of US Marines and not one of them would ever assault a civilian for the peaceful exercise of a basic constitutional right. In fact, they would find the joke above highly insulting unless told in private by one Marine to other Marines. It implies a lack of discipline and self-control which might happen in "the other branches" but never within the highly-trained cadre of America's "real soldiers". Implying that a Marine can't control his aggression and channel it only toward the enemy calls into question all of their training and skills and ethos.

But if it DID happen, the Marine would probably be sent for a PTSD evaluation first.
 

Kevin Kowalczyk
Intermediate Member
Username: Itsfunbrewingbeer

Post Number: 497
Registered: 10-2007
Posted on Tuesday, March 17, 2009 - 12:53 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I wasn't taking it seriously. And I know what you're saying about Marines to be true as well--in fact that's why I commented.
 

Connie
Senior Member
Username: Connie

Post Number: 1358
Registered: 10-2000
Posted on Tuesday, March 17, 2009 - 09:57 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Hey guys...notice the heading where this is posted....humor section.
If you don't do humor, drive on through.
Probably not funny to the hard left anyway
 

Bill Pierce
Moderator
Username: Billpierce

Post Number: 10118
Registered: 01-2002
Posted on Tuesday, March 17, 2009 - 11:17 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Connie, yes, it's a joke, and I smiled, but humor sometimes tries to mask a message.

My own thoughts are that God doesn't need the Marines.
 

ScottDeW
Advanced Member
Username: Scott

Post Number: 570
Registered: 03-2003
Posted on Tuesday, March 17, 2009 - 11:31 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

No, he doesn't Bill.

That's why He gave them to us.

Scott
http://texanbrew.com
 

Kevin Kowalczyk
Intermediate Member
Username: Itsfunbrewingbeer

Post Number: 499
Registered: 10-2007
Posted on Wednesday, March 18, 2009 - 03:20 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Humor, yes, hence the humorous response on my part--it's called sarcasm. And Connie, I hope you're not assuming I'm hard left--if so, I find that funny because on another (non-brewing) board I belong to, I got accused of being right-wing because I was defending Sarah Palin. I guess Dan Listermann would say it's bimodal--but both sides are doing it.
 

Paul Hayslett
Senior Member
Username: Paulhayslett

Post Number: 2098
Registered: 02-2002
Posted on Wednesday, March 18, 2009 - 12:33 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Calling hostility humor doesn't make it so. That joke, Connie, is the intellectual equivalent of hiding with your buddies behind a fence and pelting the rich kid with snowballs. It's only funny to your friends behind the fence, and anyone else with no empathy for the rich kid. To an outside observer, it is just hostility.

That aside, I was only pointing out the irony of choosing a US Marine to be your Thought Police. Yes, Thought Police. The point of the joke is that he will punish and silence intellectuals, atheists, lefties, and anyone else who says things which make you uncomfortable. A Marine is the worst possible choice.

Al Qaida are Thought Police. The Taliban are Thought Police. The governments of nasty regimes from Algeria to Zimbabwe employ Thought Police to repress their own citizens. Every Marine I know would find the comparison offensive and insulting. The US Marines are no one's Thought Police.
 

Joakim Ruud
Senior Member
Username: Joques

Post Number: 1388
Registered: 10-2005
Posted on Wednesday, March 18, 2009 - 01:16 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Well said.
 

Denny Conn
Senior Member
Username: Denny

Post Number: 7174
Registered: 01-2001
Posted on Wednesday, March 18, 2009 - 06:30 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

+1000!
 

Connie
Senior Member
Username: Connie

Post Number: 1359
Registered: 10-2000
Posted on Wednesday, March 18, 2009 - 06:47 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I thought it was a nice feel good story...no politics, no hidden meanings, no snow balls or ambushes.....I must not be drinking enough
 

Joakim Ruud
Senior Member
Username: Joques

Post Number: 1389
Registered: 10-2005
Posted on Wednesday, March 18, 2009 - 08:09 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

No politics?! Are you high??! :-)
 

Bob Wall
Senior Member
Username: Brewdudebob

Post Number: 2485
Registered: 11-2004
Posted on Wednesday, March 18, 2009 - 09:03 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Paul,

I understand defending the honor of the Marines, but where do you get off denigrating the rest of the Armed Forces? Are you saying that Army, Navy, Air Force, and Coast Guard personnel are inferior to the Marines? Have you ever been in the service?

Talk about "highly insulting"
 

Belly Buster Bob
Senior Member
Username: Canman

Post Number: 3060
Registered: 02-2003
Posted on Thursday, March 19, 2009 - 02:16 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

wholly crap folks, it was a joke.
and a good one at that.
as said earlier, don't do humour? Drive thru
 

dhacker
Senior Member
Username: Dhacker

Post Number: 1665
Registered: 11-2002
Posted on Thursday, March 19, 2009 - 02:45 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I agree Belly, thank you.

I smiled at the ending, thought nothing of any political ramifications and considered it harmless.

Seems that people these days actively seek out reasons to be pissed.
 

Paul Hayslett
Senior Member
Username: Paulhayslett

Post Number: 2102
Registered: 02-2002
Posted on Thursday, March 19, 2009 - 04:44 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Bob, *I* wasn't saying anything about the other branches. Nor would I. My dad was Air Force. My uncle was Navy. My grandfather was Army. My cousin is Coast Guard.

But it only takes a short while talking to any Marine to find out what *they* think of the other branches. The Navy exists to carry them around, the Army exists to hold the territory they take, the Air Force exists to provide them with air cover when there are no Marine planes available, and the Coast Guard doesn't count. It is just part of being a Marine to believe that the Corps is superior to the rest.

Sorry. I didn't create that belief, nor do I share it. I just know that it exists.
 

dhacker
Senior Member
Username: Dhacker

Post Number: 1666
Registered: 11-2002
Posted on Thursday, March 19, 2009 - 01:28 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Connie,

I took the liberty to revise your post. I'm sure this version will be much more acceptable.



A United States fictitious character perhaps serving in one of the fictitious branches of the military, or not, was attending some college courses between assignments. He had completed missions in undisclosed and fictitious places (for security reasons and also to not be able to determine which branch of the fictitious military he may have been serving in so as not to create discord among other branches of a fictitious military branch.) One of the courses had a professor who was a fictitious avowed non- believer in any religious order and a person who also had some knowledge of the goings on in the **** (acronym removed so as not to offend fictitious members of said organization.)

One day the professor shocked the class when he came in he looked to the ceiling and flatly stated, “Genderless Mystical Entity of non-human descent, who can be whatever is necessary to satisfy the personal conveniences of those who may seek to follow you, if you are real, then I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you exactly 15 minutes . . .”

The Lecture room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop. Ten minutes went by and the professor proclaimed, “Here I am Genderless Mystical Entity of non-human descent, who can be whatever is necessary to satisfy the personal conveniences of those who may seek to follow you , I'm still waiting. . .” It got down to the last couple of minutes when the United States fictitious character perhaps serving in one of the fictitious branches of the military, or not, got out of his chair, went up to the professor, and cold-cocked him, knocking him off the platform. The professor was laying on the floor out cold. The United States fictitious character perhaps serving in one of the fictitious branches of the military, or not, went back to his seat and sat there, silently. The other individuals who may or may not have been students and may have been equally divided as males and females were shocked, stunned, and sat there looking on in silence. The Professor eventually came to, noticeably shaken, looked at the United States fictitious character perhaps serving in one of the fictitious branches of the military, or not, and asked, What the heck is the matter with you? Why did you do that? The United States fictitious character perhaps serving in one of the fictitious branches of the military, or not, calmly replied, “The Genderless Mystical Entity of non-human descent, who can be whatever is necessary to satisfy the personal conveniences of those who may seek to follow him was too busy today protecting a certain group of people in a certain geographical region of the planet who are protecting your right to stay in the mental frame of mind you have chosen for yourself and also to act like a person who has chosen to act in a way commiserate with the aforementioned frame of mind. So, He sent me.

(Que . . Roaring Laughter)
 

Connie
Senior Member
Username: Connie

Post Number: 1362
Registered: 10-2000
Posted on Thursday, March 19, 2009 - 01:55 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Hey Hacker,
Thanks, but I still prefer the first version. I'm a Marine supporter all the way. Those who can't handle it, drive on through.
 

Joakim Ruud
Senior Member
Username: Joques

Post Number: 1390
Registered: 10-2005
Posted on Thursday, March 19, 2009 - 02:07 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Oh oh, my sides are splitting...
 

ScottDeW
Advanced Member
Username: Scott

Post Number: 571
Registered: 03-2003
Posted on Thursday, March 19, 2009 - 02:58 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Hacker,

I'm a bit insulted that your story shows all US citizens to be either panzies or bullies.

Edit:
OK, reading this I realize that there are those who have:
A. No humor
B. No sense of sarcasm

So, I'll edit my note above with a :-) to show the intent.

But that is probably not enough so I’ll go on and explain. Hacker did a marvelous job paraphrasing the joke to poke fun at not only those feigning offense (no, I don’t believe any of you are offended, really) but to illustrate the absurdity of modern day Political Correctness. It was a masterful job; however, in this day of cross-country communication that is the Internet, one must remember to be inclusive of those who do not live in the United States.

I shall now take my tongue from my cheek as it gets in the way of my Novgorod Imperial Stout.


Scott
http://texanbrew.com

(Message edited by scott on March 19, 2009)
 

Joakim Ruud
Senior Member
Username: Joques

Post Number: 1392
Registered: 10-2005
Posted on Thursday, March 19, 2009 - 04:07 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

How does political correctness even enter into it? That "joke" is about seeing violence as an acceptable solution to uncomfortable sentiments. It tells me more than I wanted to know about Connie.

("It's just a joke" is the world's laziest argument.)
 

Bill Pierce
Moderator
Username: Billpierce

Post Number: 10128
Registered: 01-2002
Posted on Thursday, March 19, 2009 - 04:48 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Joakim, I don't see Connie as a fanatical fundamentalist. From my perspective he merely failed to recognize the underlying message in his joke that endorses violence in the name of intolerance. As you and a couple of others pointed out, this is what has happened in other times or places when one set of beliefs is rigidly enforced to the exclusion of all others.

Whatever God I envision is able to accept the existence of nonbelievers and the free expression of their opinions. And as Paul H. eloquently noted, the Marines are the guardians of freedom rather than the enforcers of orthodoxy.
 

Joakim Ruud
Senior Member
Username: Joques

Post Number: 1393
Registered: 10-2005
Posted on Thursday, March 19, 2009 - 05:11 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Bill, I'll take your word for it :-)
 

Connie
Senior Member
Username: Connie

Post Number: 1363
Registered: 10-2000
Posted on Thursday, March 19, 2009 - 09:18 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Thanks Bill.
I'm not a fanatical fundamentalist, just a guy from the deep South that does believe in God, Marines and feel good stories. I have a hard time believing this simple "humorous" story pulled so many chains.
 

Bill Pierce
Moderator
Username: Billpierce

Post Number: 10129
Registered: 01-2002
Posted on Thursday, March 19, 2009 - 11:18 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Connie, I suspect you're from the generation that would say there are no atheists in a foxhole.
 

Connie
Senior Member
Username: Connie

Post Number: 1364
Registered: 10-2000
Posted on Friday, March 20, 2009 - 04:26 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

 

Joakim Ruud
Senior Member
Username: Joques

Post Number: 1396
Registered: 10-2005
Posted on Friday, March 20, 2009 - 07:39 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

That's an argument against foxholes, not an argument for god

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