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Skotrat
Intermediate Member
Username: Skotrat

Post Number: 254
Registered: 07-2007
Posted on Saturday, October 13, 2007 - 01:08 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I just about never post to this topic but today I figure what the heck.

You Know...

I can now see why some kids end up seriously fecked up when they hit their teens. My Daughter is now in the 6th grade.... So she is meeting kids that she has not met before.
She has a new friend sleep over last night and the kids father or step father comes to pick up the kid this morning.

No Big deal really right?

The guy shows up at 8:15am as planned and then just sits out in the driveway and waits...

Never comes in never gets out of the truck...

Just sits there.

WTF?

I did not even know that he was waiting except for the fact that the dogs started barking. This guy does not know me. I do not know him. Yet he will not even take the time to check out the house and my family to make sure that we are "OKAY" and that his child is in a safe place?

That in my mind is just messed up beyond my ability to think it through...

The really terrible part is that this is not an uncommon event. I see it all the time; Probably as much as half or more of the parents never come in to get their kids. Even when I was growing up in the middle of Manhattan my parents almost always took the time to at least scope out the families of the kids that I was hanging around with.
 

Paul Hayslett
Senior Member
Username: Paulhayslett

Post Number: 1377
Registered: 02-2002
Posted on Saturday, October 13, 2007 - 02:10 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Maybe this guy knows the parents of some of my son's friends. Not a week goes by that my son, aged 13, doesn't ask to rent some movie or buy some video game riddled with horrific violence. And every time we say no (which is always), he insists that "Joey watched it" or "Bobby has it" or "Darrin rented it when he was 11!"

I'm sure some of that is manufactured. But too much is true. I ask one dad if he really let his kids rent a horror movied I knew to be gruesome in the extreme, one that just barely squeaked an R rating by recutting some scenes. He said, "Why? Is it bad?" The guy hadn't even bothered to read the back of the box in the video store! I guess that was a little too much effort for him as a parent.

Some of these parents should just hang a sign on their foreheads saying "Not paying attention!"
 

Tom Burk
Member
Username: Tomburk

Post Number: 155
Registered: 03-2003
Posted on Sunday, October 14, 2007 - 02:38 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I've been teaching over 28 years and you are going to see more of the same as you raise your kids. Skot, alot of the parents do the same thing when they come to school. They walk in and out of the building or my program and they are on the phone or in their own little world with little or no interaction with their kids.

Paul when our kids were young we had the same comments from our kids. The good thing was, most of our kids friends liked to be at our house because we had rules and talked with the kids.

If you get to spend time with the kids, please talk to them. So many of the students I work with have no adult that actually will take the time to have an adult conversation.
 

Bob Wall
Senior Member
Username: Brewdudebob

Post Number: 1152
Registered: 11-2004
Posted on Sunday, October 14, 2007 - 04:54 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

My boys are 12 & 14 and I have not seen anything like what you are talking about Skot, I guess I am just sheltered, or lucky. But that is a frightening story. I feel sorry for those kids.

And Paul's mention of inappropriate movies brings back a funny memory. About 7 or 8 years ago, when the boys were real young, they were visiting our next-door neighbors with my wife. The neighbors were empty-nesters and had one son who was off to college. So the boys were looking through their video collection and saw a cartoon video and wanted to watch it. The neighbors let the boys borrow it and they brought it home. So later that day, the wife and I are in the other room when suddenly we hear singing and it went like this:

"Weeelllll,

Kyle's mom's a bitch, she's a big fat bitch,
She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world,
She's a stupid bitch, if there ever was a bitch,
She's a bitch to all the boys and girls.

On Monday she's a bitch
On Tuesday she's a bitch
On Wednesday thru Saturday she's a bitch
Then on Sunday just to be different,
Shes u super king kamehameha bitch

Have you ever met my friend Kyle's Mom,
She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world,
She's a mean old bitch, she has stupid hair,
She's a bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch
Bitch, bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch
She's a stupid bitch, Kyle's Mom's a bitch,
And she's such a dirty bitch.

Talk to kids around the world,
It might go a little something like this...

[Sung in three different languages by other children]

Have you ever met my friend Kyle's Mom,
She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world,
She's a mean old bitch, she has stupid hair,
She's a bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch
Bitch, bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch.
She's a stupid bitch, Kyle's Mom's a bitch,
And she's such a dirty bitch;

I really mean it,
Kyle's Mom, she's a big fat, stinking bitch
Big old fat fuckin' bitch, Kyle's Mommmmmmmmmmm
Yeahhhhh, Chaaaaa"


It was the South Park movie. Neither my wife nor the neighbors had any idea what South Park was. Needless to say, South Park became their favorite cartoon from that moment. I got alot of mileage out of that one. Any time the wife questioned my parenting skills, all I had to do was start singing...
 

dhacker
Senior Member
Username: Dhacker

Post Number: 1098
Registered: 11-2002
Posted on Sunday, October 14, 2007 - 01:42 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Hey Skot,

Maybe it was a good thing the guy didn't come in.

Here's how I imagine the initial meeting would have unfolded . . .

" . . Hey, how ya doin'? My name is Scott. . Just want to let you know how much we've enjoyed having your daughter over. In fact, I was just showing her where I make my homemade beer, 55 gallons ay a time! . . ."

You know what they say about 1st impressions . . .
 

Paul Hayslett
Senior Member
Username: Paulhayslett

Post Number: 1381
Registered: 02-2002
Posted on Sunday, October 14, 2007 - 05:25 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Heh. That reminds me of a story.

My son's friends have some very concerned, caring parents as well. In particular, our town's Chief of Police, who is a teetotaler, is one. The first time Evan came over was a brew day. My wife wasn't home, so I was watching the kids with one eye while hanging with my friends and brewing outside. John arrives toward the end of the session, as we are tucking in the last of 4 batches and raising a couple to celebrate.

Sure, Evan's around here somewhere. Hold my beer while I go look for him.

I'm not sure whether or not it helped that among the crew that day were the teacher the boys had in 3rd grade and the retired principal of the school. Maybe it just made him queasy to think his kid had been in their care.

I guess we didn't make too bad an impression because now we are all good friends. Still, it couldn't have looked too good.
 

Bill Pierce
Moderator
Username: Billpierce

Post Number: 7834
Registered: 01-2002
Posted on Sunday, October 14, 2007 - 05:46 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

During the time I briefly lived in Utah I learned not to mention my interests (also my occupation at the time). On the rare occasions I did, it was usually met with uncomfortable silence.
 

Skotrat
Intermediate Member
Username: Skotrat

Post Number: 256
Registered: 07-2007
Posted on Sunday, October 14, 2007 - 06:09 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

chirp... chirp... chirp...
 

Belly Buster Bob
Senior Member
Username: Canman

Post Number: 2911
Registered: 02-2003
Posted on Monday, October 15, 2007 - 12:37 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

please don't get me started on this one....we chose for a parent to stay home to raise our kids......outcasts I tell'ya
 

Bob Wall
Senior Member
Username: Brewdudebob

Post Number: 1153
Registered: 11-2004
Posted on Monday, October 15, 2007 - 01:08 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

I dunno BBB, when we first moved here, WE were the outcasts cause we both work.
 

Mike G.
Member
Username: Mikeg

Post Number: 182
Registered: 04-2005
Posted on Monday, October 15, 2007 - 09:06 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

In my neck of the woods, I hear a fair amount of sentiment implying that kids are a burden which is best removed early.

A small example, our school recently moved to "all day, every day" kindergarten. They did still offer (but discouraged) the option for half-days, every day, which we took advantage of (my wife is at home during school hours). We were one of two parents out of 45 parents to do this. When the school had the meeting describing the new system, the sentiment I heard was, "take 'em at age 2 or 3 if you want, they are just a hassle for me"

Just a small anecdote, not necessarily representative, but these are the parents of our children's peers. I guess we have our work cut out for us....
 

Mike Huss
Senior Member
Username: Mikhu

Post Number: 1755
Registered: 03-2003
Posted on Tuesday, October 16, 2007 - 12:35 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Our neighbors have three kids. Those idiot parents forced their then 3 year old to watch over and supervise their then 1 year old. It's astonishing she never got seriously hurt or snatched, because as you can imagine a 3 year old isn't much of a babysitter.
 

Belly Buster Bob
Senior Member
Username: Canman

Post Number: 2912
Registered: 02-2003
Posted on Tuesday, October 16, 2007 - 03:40 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Just recently here, a 3 yr old took his 1 yr old sister for a ride in his battery powered hummer....down a busy street for 4 blocks!!!! I was shocked at the story but the main focus of the story was that the child actually stopped for the stop signs not the fact that the parental supervision was nonexistant and in my mind near criminal. Not to mention that there were many phone calls to police but not one bystander/motorist stopped to get the children off the road.


(Message edited by canman on October 16, 2007)
 

Belly Buster Bob
Senior Member
Username: Canman

Post Number: 2913
Registered: 02-2003
Posted on Tuesday, October 16, 2007 - 03:54 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

seems to me that negligence in parenting is socially acceptable these days. I think alot of folks have forgotten that we are raising adults....not children.
 

Paul Hayslett
Senior Member
Username: Paulhayslett

Post Number: 1383
Registered: 02-2002
Posted on Tuesday, October 16, 2007 - 03:58 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

The roads in my neighborhood are private -- the neighborhood association owns them -- so it's kind of a gray area which traffic laws apply. Several parents have decided that this means they can drive golf carts on the roads. With their kids on their laps or on the seat beside them. Regular golf carts w/o doors or seat belts or roll bars or any of that stuff. Whether or not it is legal doesn't change the fact that they are sharing the road with SUVs going 35mph. It's only a matter of time....
 

Jake Isaacs
Intermediate Member
Username: Jake

Post Number: 447
Registered: 04-2002
Posted on Tuesday, October 16, 2007 - 09:05 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Although my son (2.5 yrs) is as gentle as they come, I wouldn't dream of putting him in any sort of childcare role, even for a few minutes. Recently when I was trying to get my daughter (5 mos) to stop crying, he stopped playing, slowly walked over, gently took both her hands, leaned in so he was nose-to-nose, and screamed as loud as he could in her face
 

Belly Buster Bob
Senior Member
Username: Canman

Post Number: 2914
Registered: 02-2003
Posted on Wednesday, October 17, 2007 - 12:21 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

priceless moments eh Jake??
 

Ted Grudzinski
Member
Username: Tgrudzin

Post Number: 218
Registered: 08-2003
Posted on Thursday, October 18, 2007 - 04:18 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Ban Poster IP (Moderator/Admin only)

Skorat, your story brought up something else to consider, as you have a 6th grade girl. Be very careful not to be around her friends alone. Whether it is true or not, I heard a story of a father driving the babysitter home (Texas). Later on, the girl claimed the man tried to come on to her sexually. He had to defend himself and she eventually said she made it up. But I always made it a practice never to drive a baby sitter or any of her girlfriends alone. Either my wife drove them or my daughter or son would come with me. I never wanted even the chance that someone could make the same charges. Sad that that had to be the case.
I also tell my kids that I expect door-to-door delivery of any friends and especially dates. No driveway pickups.

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